slinky...

"sometimes I wonder who he's picturing when he looks at me and smiles..." -Starr

I think about the days I used to run with different guys not becuz they had a title or anything was exclusive but just becuz thats just what we used to do. And this headline that Starr has made me think about it more. I never noticed the differences in the expression of a person till I thought about it after. I remember looking into his eyes and even as I was drunk, I was good enough to know what was going on and the only thing in my mind was.... Who are u thinking about? And as his lips touched mine and our tongues intertwined, as he touched in places he shouldn't have been able to visit and he caressed places that shouldn't had ever been in his possession, all that my mind could say "Who is he thinking of.." In the deep heat of the moment and all I could think of was if his mind was on me... After that reminiscent moment, my mind jumped to another event a little further back. This person had a title and all I could see in his eyes was a hunger for something he would never get. Something that even in the moments' hottest temperatures, he would never enjoy... In my class, thinking about these times and further into my past, my brain cells climbed... It continued to another idea... The days I was with Blank... I remember seeing nothing in his expression and it was mostly forced. Maybe that was a reason why I held on... why I always thought it might get somewhere... Why I always thought that it could change and be different later on... And as I think about certain occassions, I remember always getting him to smile... HE smiled and he cant ever deny me that. He was happy with me... Maybe we werent together in the context I wanted but he cant ever say I never made him happy. Even today, many months later after I cut it off... I can always be sure of is that at least when he was with me, he was thinking of me... But with the other guys... I'll never kno, will I? Makes me wonder... summer after 10th grade... was he actually thinking about me... was i just another girl... probably was... considering the situation... At least now that Im with my slinky, Ill never have to question that. Cause I can see it in his eyes, I am the one hes thinking of. I am the one who he wants... He got no one else to think about... I am his girl... Hes my man... When he smiles at me, its ME that hes thinking of... I have no reason to question that... I ask you...
Do you wonder who hes picturing when he looks at you and smiles??!